13# From Swiping to Love

The True Essence of Modern Relationships

The modern zeitgeist has created more flexible ways of communicating. People have stopped fighting for their relationships. It's easier to ignore someone than to talk things through, challenge each other's opinions, raise our voices, make compromises and ultimately try to understand the other person and accept them as they are.

In recent years, we've learned to become more flexible. There are so many possibilities waiting for us that we no longer feel the need to commit to anything, secretly afraid of missing out on something better.

Thanks to digital religions like Tinder and the like, we now like and swipe people away more efficiently than ever, as though they were interchangeable products designed to satisfy our twisted consumer desires.

High Expectations of Relationships

First and foremost, the project called "relationship" is supposed to fulfil our wishes: getting married, having children, buying a house.

Our partner is expected to fit our ideal image, like a ready-made template – a perfect match, without the slightest deviation from our expectations.

We're spoiled for choice!

Working on a Relationship Means Hard Work

But relationships and marriages are hard work.

Two strangers from different families come together to create something new and intertwine their lives. This requires adaptation, compromise and putting one's own pride aside.

Love alone isn't enough.

If you like someone and have things in common, that's already worth a great deal. And when disagreements arise, talk about them. Try to convince each other, reconsider your perspectives, but don't give up on one another so quickly!

There will be no "better candidate" waiting around the corner. We all have our flaws and imperfections.

Love Is a Child of an Endless War

— Sting

The secret of my marriage?

We always knew things could have been worse.

And when things became difficult, we talked, we fought, we tried to change each other – but we never gave up on one another simply because the other person didn't fit our ideal image.

We saw disagreements as opportunities, as chances to develop our personalities and become better people through one another.

It is love that shapes us – our character, our personality.

It teaches us what we want and what we don't want, what we're willing to give and what we're prepared to accept from another person.

It teaches us to learn from each other and grow together, to be vulnerable, to experience pain and ultimately to blossom into strength with renewed energy.

Those who ignore their chance of a serious relationship remain forever trapped in their illusory cocoon of love.

Anastasia Weimer